Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
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