do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
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