rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
did you just send me my own nude
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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