So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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