no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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