She's JV to your varsity
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
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