Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
