I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
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