Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Randomize
