this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
May the power of my ass compel you!!
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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