It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
