i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize