i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize