According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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