Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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