He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
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