We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
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