he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
birth control should be required to get into college
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
