My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize