ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
