I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
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