Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
