And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
The beer is more important than you right now.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
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Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
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Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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