you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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