Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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