Pregnant stripper...not hot.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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