shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
As shirtless as possible
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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