he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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