Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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