remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
