we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
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