Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
