I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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