Rock
Scissors
Fuck
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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