your parents love me but you hate me
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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