In the future we'll all be gay
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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