I didn't shave. On purpose
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
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