They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
