We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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