What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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