Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Found your dick twin last night
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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