I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
