is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
MIDGETS
????
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
