Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize
