My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize