so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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