Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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