Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize