i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
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Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
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