So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I checked into jail on foursquare
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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