The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize